Side By Side
Side by side sexual positions
Click on the pictures to enlarge them!
Side by side sexual positions are simply the best for gentle, slow, romantic sex - and they're also great for rumbustious, hard, sexy thrusting!
Then, you're in a very intimate position which allows both mutual caresses on almost all parts of your bodies, and also gives a sense of true connection by allowing the two sex partners to place their hands on each others' hearts whilst gazing into each others' eyes.
There's magic to be gained from this kind of connection during sex, as people who have studied tantra will know, and side-by-side sexual positions are ideal for enjoying it because they are by their very nature so relaxing.
You don't get the muscle tension and strain that comes from supporting your weight in the man on top position, and you're not distracted by the rampant excitement of, say, the rear entry sexual position. Yes, these are different sexual techniques well worth a try!
As if that wasn't enough, another advantage of the side-by-side position is that because the angle of penetration puts less pressure on the man's penis, he's likely to be able to last much longer in this position he can in any other.
Clearly, this is a massive advantage for any man who wants to know the art of ejaculation control.
So what have we established about this rather different sexual technique so far?
First, that sex is extremely intimate; second, that it allows mutual caressing and eye gazing; and third, that it's great for men who tend to ejaculate too quickly.
What more is there to say about it? Well, in fact there's actually quite a bit!
While the man enjoys thrusting into his partner, she can play with her clitoris while he plays with her breasts, or indeed the man can play with both her breasts and her clitoris, which gives her a very good opportunity to reach orgasm during lovemaking.
This can be an extraordinarily thrilling experience for both the man and the woman, and if he is graced with enough staying power, he can delay his own orgasm and ejaculation until she begins to convulse and contract in the throes of her orgasm.
At this point, the man can thrust harder and faster, or deeper, into his partner, thereby causing himself to tip over into his own orgasm as his partner's vagina contracts around his erect penis.
What an amazing experience this can be for a couple who are in love, or indeed or indeed for a long-standing couple who have never enjoyed the experience of simultaneous orgasm.
So we're beginning to see a huge list of advantages to side-by-side sexual positions, which makes it all the more extraordinary that most couples report that they enjoy side-by-side sex less than 5% of the time.
Why is this? It's hard to know, but whenever I look at sexual practices, positions, and techniques these days, I'm always mindful of what's shown in porn. There's so much pornography on the Internet - it's extraordinary.
Not all of it very nice, of course. And in particular the stuff that seems to appeal to most men is generally rear entry, man on top, or woman on top.
Side by side sexual techniques are different - they don't get much of a look in, and if people are adapting their sexual techniques to match what they see in porn, then perhaps that's one reason why side-by-side sex postures aren't so common in real life.
Who knows, though? But whatever the reason, side-by-side sexual positions come highly recommended.
Because the movement of the man's hips is slightly restricted, he can't easily thrust as hard or as deep as he could during, say, man on top sex.
And this, combined with the fact that the pressure on his penis is much less, is yet another way in which the position helps him to last longer in bed.
Having said that, it's certainly a sexy position: the woman can wrap her legs around her man and bring him in close, and he can wrap his arms around her body and hold her tight, either to kiss and connect with her, or to hold her as he thrusts deeply into her body: either of these variations is very sexy.
But there's another very sexy one, too: the woman can actually lift her upper leg up so that the couple have full view of the man's hard penis sliding in and out of her vagina, shiny and moist with her love juices.
For some men, that's a sight so sexy it can make them come much more quickly, so use this variation with caution! If you want to know how you can prevent rapid or premature ejaculation, this may not be ideal!
What other differences? Well, the romantic element of side-by-side sex can be enhanced further.
It's entirely possible for a couple enjoying the side by side sexual technique to make love face-to-face, or facing the same way, with the man behind the woman, in which case the man's chest will be against the woman's back.
This is a perfect lovemaking position in which to enjoy each other and then fall asleep locked together in a romantic embrace. I've even heard of couples who fall asleep with the man's penis still softening inside his partner's vagina after he has ejaculated.
However you look at it, side-by-side sexual techniques have a great deal to recommend them.... and I nearly forgot to mention the fact that the female partner has a fabulous opportunity to thrust in synchrony with her man during sex in this position.
That can be really enjoyable for everybody, but for couples where the man is extremely well endowed, it's a great advantage because the couple can easily control the depth of penetration - so the woman remains comfortable during intercourse.
Also, by adept use of some lubrication on her thighs, it's easy to create the illusion for the man that he is pushing the entire length of his erection into her vagina, even though a portion of it remains outside her body, between her thighs. This is known as interfemoral intercourse.
So here are some pictures of side-by-side sex, together with some of the more common variations on this theme:
A woman's viewpoint
I asked my female partner to write a piece for this page, because I was interested in what women think about the side-by-side sexual techniques.
She writes: I think side-by-side sexual positions are great for the start of lovemaking, because I often want to establish a close connection with my partner before we get into the heavy-duty sex.
As you can see from the pictures that we've put on this page, one great advantage is that our hands are free to caress each other -- even the more sexy parts of our bodies are available, such as his balls and my bottom!
When I clasp my legs around my partner, he gets really excited and immediately starts to thrust harder and faster.
And I think he mentioned above that with my leg in the air, so that he can see his cock sliding in and out of my pussy, he's likely to come very quickly indeed!
I enjoy all this because it gives me a sense of my female sexual power, my ability to arouse and excite him and make him come!
And I've never lost a sense of thrill when watching a man orgasm inside me in all the years I've been making love: it's awe-inspiring!
And there's no better sexual technique in which to enjoy this amazing experience than side-by-side positions.
One of the great advantages of side-by-side sex is that it's very variable: you don't have to stay in the same position all the time you make love.
Instead, you can use the variations that I've already described for the position of the woman's legs -- which you can see in the photographs -- and you can even disengage completely, and resume lovemaking with the woman lying flat on the bed face down, and the man thrusting between her buttocks into her pussy.
This is a great position from which to roll backwards onto your sides so that you're now making love in the side-by-side position but both facing the same way, which is an interesting variation on the side-by-side facing each other position.
In fact when I say variation, what I mean is this: the sensations and experience of sex in the side by side "facing away from each other" variations are totally different to those in the facing each other orientations: you get a completely different take on lovemaking.
No doubt you'll find that one or other of these is much more exciting for you -- that might depend, for example, on whether the man prefers the feel and sight of his partner's buttocks, or the feel and sight of his partner's breasts!
I know this sounds a bit like objectification of women, but let's face facts: men love sex for many different reasons, and a major one is being able to touch and get excited by female bodies!
So I make no apology for reveling in the fact that I have the power to turn my man on because I have a nice butt and a pair of breasts!
And he loves to ejaculate by thrusting between them! That thrills me too, first because it's so exciting to know I turn him on so much, and second because seeing him shooting a load over me makes me feel aroused and sexy!
Such inhibited sex play is what sex is all about!
One of things that you need to be a little bit careful about in side-by-side sexual techniques is that if you're starting in the man on top position, when you roll over onto your sides, you both need to go the same way (obviously), and you also need to make sure the woman's leg is hoiked up high enough before you rollover, otherwise she's going to get a crushed thigh.
You can see the positions that your legs need to be in if you look at the photographs, so I'm not going to explain them here. What I will say, however, is that you can always wriggle around and adjust yourself until you're comfortable.
And note also that side by side, though different in many ways, is a great position for fat or pregnant women, or for fat men, or even for fat men and fat women together.
You'll see some of the photographs show a variation on side-by-side sex which is generally known as the scissors position.
I'm not really a fan of all the silly names that people give to sexual techniques just to make them seem more interesting, because I think there are actually only a few basic sexual positions and everything else is a variation on a theme.
Still, I wouldn't deny that different sexual techniques have different advantages, and as far as I'm concerned side-by-side is one of the tops.
It allows my partner to massage my vulva and clitoris as my man enters me and thrusts gently; generally speaking I can get to orgasm while we enjoy our lovemaking, which is one of my best sexual experiences.
A note also that if you're a guy who tends to ejaculate too quickly, and you want to put an end to premature ejaculation, all you have to do is just stop moving and lie still.
Now, generally when you do this, a woman's sexual arousal drops quite quickly, but in this different position you actually have the ability to keep playing with the woman's clitoris so that her arousal remains high while your arousal drops so that you move away from the point of your ejaculation! What could be better than that!
My partner tells me that from his point of view, one of the great advantages of side-by-side sex is the sheer indulgence that it offers, by which I think he means that he can watch himself penetrating me, he can enter me slowly, and he can enjoy it to the full. He's always said that he's never lost the thrill which comes from penetrating me -- it's like the first time, every time.
I really appreciate the compliment, and because I've taken the trouble to exercise my vaginal muscles, I can squeeze his penis when he's inside me and send him into absolute heaven.
He's also keen on side by side sex because, to be honest, he did once have a tendency to ejaculate quite quickly -- which I regarded as a great compliment! -- so this is a very useful position for ejaculation control, and it's by enjoying hours of relaxing lovemaking in this position that we've achieved much greater ejaculation control for him.
Side by side sexual techniques - a few final observations
It's a great lovemaking position for couples if you're not that fit or well, because it's actually quite relaxing: indeed, it's the least tiring of all sexual positions.
So if you want to try some different sexual positions, and you want some great sexual experiences at the same time, this is probably the route to go.
With that in mind, I just want to give you a few simple instructions on how to get into the position: start with the man lying on his right side facing his partner, who lies turned towards him on her left side.
She then raises her lower leg, the one on the bed, and passes it over his lower leg, bending it a little at the knee and pushing her thigh high up between the man's.
He then passes his upper leg over her lower leg at the same time maneuvering his penis into line with her vagina entrance.
The woman will nearly always have to help his penis into her vagina; as soon as the man feels the warm softness of her vagina around his penis, he thrusts his upper leg as far over as it will go, which pushes his penis deeper into her.
She then passes her upper leg over his upper leg, bending it so that, if possible, she can take a purchase with the crook of her knee on the man's hipbone.
Now if that sounds a little bit hard and complicated, then just simply start in the man on top or missionary position, and then roll over in the same direction on to your sides.
Most couples enjoy it most when rolling so that the man is on his left side and the woman is on her right side -- I'm not quite sure why this should be (and of course, that only applies when you're actually making love facing each other).
Once you're in this position, have the woman move her leg up and down in various positions, and backwards and forwards, so that you can experience all the sensations that are available to you.
You'll soon find what angle of legs and bodies give you the best sensations, the ones that help you enjoy sex most.
Finally, if you move around and you're not shy about trying different angles, you might find that you end up in a sexual position where the man is lying more on his back than actually on his side.
In this case, it's unlikely that his erection will penetrate very deeply into his partner, but don't worry!
There is a great advantage to this, which is that even if he can only get the top couple of inches of his erection into his partner, as long as he can move it backwards and forwards, he has the potential for giving her some fantastic sensations, not only on her G-spot, which lies just couple of inches inside her vagina on the upper wall, but also on her vulva and clitoris: she's likely to absolutely adore the sensation of his moist glans gently caressing her vulval opening and moving upon to her clitoris.
Indeed, some women report that when their man ejaculates by rubbing his cock in this way against their clitoris, it sends them instantly into orgasm, so arousing is the experience.
However, it's possible that in this sexual technique, when the man is massaging the end of his penis against the woman's G spot, they will both produce so much love juice that friction is greatly reduced! My advice to you... try it and see!