Other Sex Positions

Having Great Sex

You know something? Having great sex isn’t just about knowing a load of positions and techniques.

For men, great sex is about ejaculation control, it’s about physical fitness, it’s about having sufficient sexual desire and motivation, and it’s also about being able to establish intimacy and knowing how to please a woman by connecting with her, emotionally, and conducting sex in a manner that suits her particular needs at the time.

For a woman, wanting sex tends to be about “feeling in the mood”, about her individual sex drive and sexual motivation, sexual desire, her ability to become aroused, the absence of sexual pain on penetration, the willingness to accept the whole concept of penetration by a man whom she loves and feels intimate with, and of course – arguably more than anything else – her ability to reach orgasm.

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So with all the psychological and physical factors coming into play, it’s no wonder that sex often goes wrong for couples. And when it has gone wrong there can be many difficulties in putting it right – not least of which is seeking advice from an independent expert who can competently deal with the issues that are presented and which are causing a couple to experience sexual problems.

For many people, the discussion of sex, even in these days of forthright openness on the Internet, is still extremely challenging. This could well be one of the reasons why Internet discussion forums, which provide a modicum of privacy and certainly can act to conceal people’s identities, are such fertile ground for the discussion of the most extraordinary sexual issues one could ever come across.

Having said all of that, there are many good programs available on the Internet which allow people to establish or restore complete sexual function, and also to overcome difficulties such as erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and even delayed ejaculation. You can read about this particular male sexual dysfunction here.

Obesity and sex

But one of the things that’s  not been mentioned very much in any forum that I can find on the Internet is the discussion of how obesity, or even a high body mass index, can affect sexual performance and sexual enjoyment.

With two thirds of the American population overweight, and one third classified as obese, this is no small issue – I’m sure the issue is arising just as much in other countries.

First of all then, we need to consider how being obese or at least overweight might affect sexual performance.

In fact there is plenty of evidence to suggest that the men with high levels of fat are disadvantaged in almost every way: confidence and self-image are affected, leading to self-consciousness about exposing the body during sexual activity; the fat stores in the body are estrogen factories, which produce hormones that are distinctly demasculinizing; the loss of testosterone produces all kinds of symptoms such as muscle weakness and lack of sexual drive; erectile dysfunction may well develop because of the position of cholesterol in the penile arteries; and physical endurance is limited because of breathlessness and physical exhaustion.

When these things are listed in this way it becomes hard to imagine how anybody thinks that they can enjoy good sex if they are overweight, let alone grossly obese.

For women, the issues may be even more serious: a woman’s body image is certainly massively impacted by being overweight, and no matter how much women might like to believe that they are immune to the sense of needing to feel attractive to enjoy sex, I strongly suspect there’s a genetic component in all women which produces a correlation between self perception of attractiveness and their willingness to engage in sex (or at least, ability to relax into sex and intimacy fully).

Now please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not suggesting that obesity is inherently wrong, I’m only pointing out the fact that it has consequences – and those consequences, let me emphasize, are not just sexual, although those are serious enough. For example, women may find their orgasm frequency is impacted in many negative ways.

Being obese, or having a high body mass index, means that once general health is affected – the circulatory system is massively impacted with cholesterol deposition, or high blood pressure, the heart struggles to pump blood round a body which is grossly obese, and lifespan is definitely shortened.

This means that anyone with a high level of self-respect, or a high level of self-esteem, is going to engage in a diet, and find somehow the willpower to continue through to completion, to achieving the level of weight that they know is correct for them, that will keep them healthy and sexually active well into their old age.

Furthermore, it’s also extremely important to remember that the old adjunct “prevention is better than cure” has no greater truth or relevance than when it comes to sexual problems – it’s a lot easier to prevent them developing the first place than it is to cure them when they have arisen!

Video – erectile dysfunction

Erectile dysfunction is often caused by long term build up of fat in the arteries - a prime reason to stay slim, control obesity, and stay fit! The simple fact is, if you do this, you will enjoy better sex!